This episode of Friday Feedback is the second in a series on strengths-based feedback:
- Intro: The feedback fallacy
- Strengths-focused feedback (This video)
- Use your strengths in a balanced way (coming soon)
Video transcription
Hi, it's Danni here and welcome to Friday Feedback.
Last week, we started this little mini-series on strengths-focused feedback and we based it on an article I shared called "The Feedback Fallacy", which says we should drop feedback. It doesn't work.
Let's start with one of the points from the article.
The authors say: Don't give feedback on people's weaknesses and people's shortcomings because it activates their threat response in the brain, which takes away from learning.
Let's just agree here. It's completely ridiculous to make this rule across the board.
Misuse of otherwise pretty good research, I'd say.
Let's take a look at why it's partially true, after all. When you give feedback on someone's weaknesses or mistakes, you risk a myriad of different and inappropriate reactions.
But it could also be that that particular feedback, that particular day, made the person finally open up and believe it and start changing their behavior and thank you forever because "Finally, someone dared to be honest with them."
The problem is that you can't predict what reaction you're going to get.
And that's why negative or weakness-focused feedback is risky.
It's simply what we call an Amygdala Hijack.
When the prefrontal cortex loses control and the Amygdala takes over, it's all about survival, get away or fight back.
Okay, so negative and error-focused feedback is riskier, but it's not necessarily bad.
This was also Anette Prehn's point back in a guest tip, where she says:
"The most important thing must be to achieve the status of the recipient."
(See also the guest tip with Anette Prehn in Friday Feedback)
Okay, so what do we do instead? So what do we do instead? If we don't have to focus so much on mistakes?
We can choose to focus on people's strengths and let our feedback help the recipient see when they are using their strengths in a good way.
Just being seen from a strengths perspective:
"You can do certain things. You have certain qualities - and that's what we start with."
It'smotivating.
And what we can do from that perspective is help them figure out "when am I using my strengths in a balanced way" and "when am I doing too much of a good thing?"
You can imagine an analytical person getting a little too analytical and shooting down ideas.
Imagine an idea person who can't seem to stay focused because new ideas are popping up all the time.
We can talk about it from a strengths focus that becomes much more nuanced; that becomes much more uplifting to talk about.
And it helps people to take in feedback, but it also helps them to use their strengths better in the future.
The balance perspective is really exciting. It's encouraging, it's motivating and there's a lot to learn. That's why we'll be exploring just that in the next episode.
Just in case you had to answer. Just off the top of your head or sitting... uh... [beep]?
Do you prefer feedback that points out your strengths or feedback that articulates flaws so you can correct them?
What would you choose if you had to pick one of them? Most people would probably say both. But you can't.
Which one would you prioritize? Contribute on LinkedIn or discuss it at your workplace.
Thanks for watching and see you again!
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